In ‘Foundational 5 for Fathers’ I share what I’ve learned since I became a father over 15 years ago. I put together my tips in the format of the “Foundational 5”. Quick reminder, the 5 are leader’s intent, objectives, organization, resources and communication to do so.
On Fatherhood
Being a father is one of the greatest challenges in life. It can be amazingly fulfilling and crushingly challenging. But hey, we chose this right? According to Dictionary.com, fatherhood is described as, “the state of being a father”. Man that’s some basic stuff. I think there’s more to it than that. To me, father hood is, “The conscious co-decision to bring another life into this world, care for them and raise them into good human beings.”
Note, co-decision. It takes two. It is also the obligation of every man that chose to pro-created, whether in the heat of the moment or as a plan to build a family to take responsibility for their children, protect them and make them forces for good in the world.
Foundational 5 for Fathers
- Leader’s Intent:
- Episode – Share my 14 years of experience with current or future fathers
- Fathers – As a father I will work to educate, protect and enable my children
- Objectives:
- Provide for the safety and welfare of my children as long as I am able
- Contribute to the mental, physical and emotional development of my children as long as I am able
- Empower my children by teaching them to fish in many aspects of life instead of giving them fish as temporary fixes
- Invest time to prepare them for the dangers of the world with practical, not merely fear based principals and knowledge
- Organization (ICS):
- Me: Unified Command, Safety, Resource Unit (Accountability), Medical Unit
- My wife: Unified Command, Liaison, Planning, Logistics, Finance/Admin
- Resources:
- My experience as a son
- Emulating traits from my father
- Not emulating some traits from my father
- Family and friends that are good examples as individuals and as fathers
- The good, the bad and the ugly from my time as a father
- Communication:
- Tell them you love them often
- Hug them every chance you get
- Explain the “Why” when you provide guidance
- Provide firm, but controlled feedback
- Pay attention to your body language
- Talk to your kids like normal people and they will be able to do so back to you
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